A Little Hope For The Holidays

managing stress over the holidays

TThe King's first Christmas broadcast was in 1932. And because King Nicky has such a nice ring to it, I thought fuck it, why not make 2021 mine? 

Dear, Commoners 😬 (Just kidding!)

Where to start? What a year 2021 has turned out to be! One beautiful outcome of this pandemic is that while we mightn’t necessarily see it, it has united us all in grief. And, while some have indeed suffered more than others, I fail to think of an individual whose life hasn't been seriously inconvenienced as a result. 

While coronavirus has united us in grief, paradoxically, it appears to have divided us in hate, with a splitting right down the middle, similar to Moses parting the Sea (Exodus 14:21, for which you can read the scientific proof of here 😳). Opinions over coronavirus, vaccines, conspiracies and everything in between have resulted in quite the extravagant, not-so-little shit show. 

I, for one, take comfort in knowing the reason for the great divide is our overwhelming need for certainty. The only difference is how one derives it. And therefore, I must conclude everyone is likely just doing their best to get through this cluster fuck of a pandemic. 

Because it's Christmas, family must now enter the mix to stir up the pot. Family time for many is great, but for many more, it, unfortunately, is not. Especially if you're going to have to eat an entire turkey sitting opposite some annoying woke shit relentless in their campaign to have you agree with all they hold to be true while demonizing you if you don't. 

The best strategy to combat such an attack may be to try and meet them with compassion and remember their need for certainty and fear of the unknown is likely what's driving their behaviour in the first place. If they persist, you can always politely ask them to shut the fuck up, and if they refuse, it's probably best for your mental health not to engage and simply retire to the drawing-room to pour yourself a big fat glass of whiskey.  

It might even be a good idea to ban all political and coronavirus-related conversations from the house this year because, frankly, I don't think there's a person out there that isn't sick to death of it all.

Moving on, while the holidays can be a wonderful time for reflection and introspection, for many, they're nothing short of hell. This can be especially true for anyone dealing with emotional stress while striving to make positive change in their life. Unfortunately, for whatever reason, this time of year has a way of increasing emotional turmoil tenfold for anyone navigating feelings of loneliness, anxiety, sadness, and even depression. Churchill said it best, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.”

While I hope this is not the reality for most of you, I know it will be a reality for too many of you. And so I urge you to welcome it all. Permit yourself to be sad, lonely, anxious, or depressed because, in my experience, anything else will only enhance the very feelings you're trying to escape from while making the journey out far more challenging than it has to be. 

First, you must permit yourself to be — and forgive yourself for being — human. Then channel whatever despair you might be feeling and use it as motivation and drive to initiate positive change for next year.

Yes, your life may suck right now. Yes, you may have to spend time with family members you don't like, and buy presents with money you don't have. You might even be talked down to, laughed at, and made to feel like a failure, whether it be relating to friendships, romance, career, finances, family, etc. And yes, you might be triggered and feel entirely overwhelmed at the thought of it all.

Embrace it. All of it. Every last ounce of it. That pain is likely the jet fuel you need for change as long as you're prepared to use it. So use it. As Bukowski once said, "You have to die a few times before you can really live." 

What positives can you yield from your situation? What steps do you need to execute to ensure feelings of anxiety, depression, sadness, and loneliness go away? And what change can you begin to initiate today? 

Remember, even though it won't feel like it, you're not alone in any of this.

The loneliness you feel is shared by many.

The sadness you feel is shared by many.

The anxiety you feel is shared by many.

The pain you feel is shared by many.

Don't turn your back on it without getting what you need from it because it will only return next year with more venom in its fangs if you do. It's in your darkest hour where creativity is spawned, battles are fought and won, resilience is cultivated, skin is thickened, and complacency is sure-as-shit never taken for granted. Without the struggle, the good days would only be that. And a little mundane. With the struggle, they become great.

Some final words to remember: Anger drains, hate drains, conflict, anxiety, sadness, loneliness, and pain — they all drain. So much of what we cling to — it drains. Humans in their suffering run from love and laughter — the very shit that lights us up. So whenever and wherever possible, don't run from it — run to it.  

You can change your entire world. Millions have done it before you. Millions will do it with you. And millions more will do it after you. The choice you have to make is whether you want to change or not? And then do everything in your power to make it happen. 

And while it doesn't have to happen tomorrow, that's something you can aspire to and create for your future. And that, dear reader, is the only shit that’s really worth fighting for. Happy holidays 🥳.